I was just at Target and was browsing the toy aisles, when I noticed that one of the shelves was empty, so out of curiosity, I looked to see what they'd sold out of... alas, it was Pregnant Midge Barbie Doll. Ack!  Husband Alan's shelf was still full, as was OB/GYN, (I'm not kidding you), Barbie.  I shreiked and ran like hell.

Access Denied

Occasionally when I'm online, I'll get an Instant Message from someone I don't know.  From past experience, I've learned that these messages are from men, (frequently married ones), who are looking for  flirty or sexual chat.  Thankfully, AOL 9.0 comes with "IM catcher" which filters out IMs from people who aren't on my buddy list, which allows me to either accept the message or ignore it.  Today I received one from a user who's name I didn't recognize, so to make sure it wasn't someone I knew, I looked up his profile, and listed under Hobbies and Interests, this guy had typed "old things".  I assure you, I did not answer this IM, and I want to tell  this person that  he needs to get a life and leave us old things alone.

Got Love? Part 1

Last week sucked for me.  Thanksgiving and the following day were especially tough..  I did spend a few hours at my folks house, eating the traditional meal, which was great, but once I returned home, I fell into a deep funk.  Most of that had to do with the fact that Dumb Fuck was supposed to pick the kids up Thanksgiving afternoon, but failed to call or to show up.  This is not unusual for him, but when it happens on a holiday, it's especially difficult to handle.  This was my first real holiday as a single parent, and it really got to me. In addition to this, Lonny was supposed to come over Thanksgiving evening, and after a half dozen phone calls to tell me that he'd be here soon, he finally confessed that he wasn't going to make it.  Also~ Dumb-Fuck's mom, (who I have a very close relationship with), never called to wish me or her grandchildren a happy Thanksgiving, although I called her 3 times that day to no avail.   On top of that, I was very sad that my friend Carol is out in Phoenix by herself for the first time, and I was originally supposed to spend the week with her. (Thanks to D.F. though, I couldn't go).  There were a few other issues bothering me, so that by Thanksgiving night, I was in tears, and it didn't get any better until Saturday, when I finally stopped feeling sorry for myself.  What snapped me out of it?  Well, I received two letters in the mail.  One was from my brother, Keith, who had hand-written me a nice, long letter telling me that he was proud of me for keeping myself together through my divorce, and that I was a strong and worthy person whom  he admired.  It made me cry, (good tears this time).  The other was a card from a dear friend of my Mom's who goes go our church. She wrote a few words about her own divorce years ago, and how she was able to pull through it, and had some very nice things to say about me.  (More tears). 

(continued below)

Got Love? Part 2

And finally, to put the crowning touch on all of this, Lonny stopped by and gave me a letter he wrote to me.  In it, he told me that I brought him a lot of happiness, and that no one in the world cares for him or has ever shown it the way that I do.  In with the letter was a dainty silver ring that he wanted me to have as a token of his love and appreciation. This is the first time in seven years that he has expressed himself in that manner to me, and it made me feel so special, (and of course, cry again.)

I have always been the kind of person who lets people know what they mean to me.  I let them know I care and that I love them.  I compliment them, and try to do nice things.  I think it's so important to tell the people you love or admire how you feel about them.  Sometimes they  need to hear those things more than you know. I urge each of you to reach out to someone who makes a difference in your life. 

 Thank you to those people who lifted my spirits this  past week by taking the time to show you care when I needed it the most.

Ode to Overg

In your eyes,  I see cloudy skies.

And in your words, I hear dismal chords.

But, it's what is in your heart that's tearing me apart.

Though, if it's me,

If I just can't read

The signs that tell

You love me still,

Please let me know

Before I go,

'Cause I can't stay

If you've gone astray.

 

 

 

gg '99

Christmas De-list.

Something that my daughter will not be getting for Christmas: Happy Family Midge Doll.  Perhaps there is nothing wrong with a pregnant Barbie doll, but this bugs the piss out of me for several reasons...

~Midge hasn't gained an ounce of weight other than her tummy.

~Midge is vamping around in high heels.

~Midge's pregnant belly is magnetic.  You just pull it off, and out pops the baby. No pain, no screaming, no afterbirth.

Is this the kind of message that we want to send young girls?  That pregnancy is glamourous?  That it's easy and fun?  That you don't get swollen ankles? 

Does this mean that people would now be required to buy a baby seat for the Barbie Jeep? 

If anyone buys this for my daughter I WILL take it back to the store and exchange it for a Swan Lake Barbie.  If she's going to live in a fantasy world, I want it to be a realistic one, dammit.

 

 

World AIDS Day

Today is World AIDS Day.  I have lost several friends to AIDS, all gay men, all in the prime of their life.  I've watched many suffer for months, slowly losing their health, their life-force, their minds.  Others have passed quickly, without much warning, without months of suffering.  I still know several people with AIDS.  One is my sister-in-law who was  infected years ago by her ex-husband, and the other is her 6 year-old son who contracted the virus in utero.  They have good days and they have bad days.  Both are on medication which sometimes causes side effects that seem worse than the virus itself.  A cure for AIDS cannot come soon enough.

I am remembering these people today in my thoughts and prayers.